I was talking with my friend, Kathy, about how even liberal and forward-thinking parents may be blind to a certain issue related to sexism: Why do we frame sex and dating generally in terms of what to do when a boy asks you out, or wants to do this or that? Why isn’t it okay for girls to ask boys out, including just as friends?
Now we parents may think that we are cool with this issue and carry no sexism, but if we ask our emerging-into-adolescent girls what they think, we may find out that they are more old-school than we are on this issue (i.e. they would never ask a boy out).
In any case, getting them talking by really listening, is always a good plan as they start to separate and distance from us, (especially daughters from mothers).
Our key message on this issue is to empower girls to know that they are truly in charge of their bodies—and their destinies. Every boy and girl, and every man and woman, is a sacred spirit who happens to have a body; and that body is their body. None of us are mere objects of use, which is an important message in a culture where there are too many “things” and not enough recognition of spirit. When the sacred in us sees the sacred in the other, we are truly relating.